Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Face V Fanny?

They say, that there will come a time in every woman's life, where she must make a decision.  She must choose between her face or her behind, "little tush" or arse, the name just depends on where you come from.  This is a choice not to be taken lightly, as it is a very difficult one.. and no I do not think you can have both.  You can be fit and strong and maybe carrying a little extra padding, than say you did in your twenties.  You cannot however, in my opinion, keep your face and remain model thin..
So I have chosen the face...

This may just prove to be my downfall, as when asked for his ambitions for 2011, my husband replied "A lean, fit and sinewy wife"...
Not that I am even remotely chubby, I do not think anyone under a UK12 (US8) can be considered over weight, I am a perfect size 10.
Of course, I have to say perfect...
I used to be a lot thinner and a lot fitter, I have given up on the dieting part, as I said I have chosen to keep my face, but I need to get back into the gym ..
Otherwise his ambition will go unfulfilled, although I do keep reminding him that I am a far more comfortable shag.. without sharp corners.

Alison Stokke
A perfect example of the physique type, desired here

... I wonder what side she will choose in the future?

The alternative, as in him finding a younger, leaner and sinewy partner, I can assure you would prove far too expensive and plus I do love to be fitter.  Not only am I stronger and more co-ordinated, but I feel a damn sight sexier too.  Clothing wise too there will be no need to replace any favourites, as I never really vary in size, just in how I fill it.
Facially, I am a Botox devotee and will continue to stretch and freeze those muscles until I am frozen in the ground myself.  Not only is it cosmetically beneficial, it is also wonderful for migraine sufferers.

The lovely Gordon Ramsay

Why not use everything that is available to you, both men and women.  There was a huge uproar about Gordon Ramsay and his hair £30000 hair transplant, but I cannot understand why.  I find men with, or without hair equally attractive, as I think sex appeal is something that oozes from within.  I also do understand, that if you are appearing on television and constantly having your photograph taken, a full head of hair does make you appear younger.  So as long as he can afford to do it along with his fillers and Botox, I say "Go for it Gordon"

Tracy Anderson.. my ideal physique

... The trainer responsible for Madonna's physique,
 looking wonderful herself

Now there are the exceptions to the rule, the beautiful people of Hollywood and the rich list sector, that have all the worlds leading plastic surgeons at their finger tips...
Such as Madonna, she has not really had to choose.  Her body, in my opinion is a work of art.. a very selfish work of art, as one can only imagine the hours that she must spend keeping it so.  We read many an article about the trainer who is responsible for this, but really it has to be Madonna herself, who dedicates the hours for training.
I am using Madonna as an example as I am closer to her age than either of the two beauties above, and anyone who has reached their mid to late forties will know that around about the age of 46 it all starts becoming a lot harder to look good and everything feels as though it is falling apart.

So we have the amazing Madonna look

... and then "The Ugly shot"

Personally I do not find this as offensive as some, I think it is a brilliant piece of paparzzi work, where she is tensing her arms.  Anyone with low body fat levels has a vein issue, you also get it in your hands and feet as you mature, shall we say rather than age..

What fascinates me, and is rarely commented on compared to her body fat, is the amount of work she has very successfully had done.  We can all critisise and say that she has the money and opportunity to have a great plastic surgeon, but it is still a huge gamble as to how you will turn out..
I think Madonna has had two lifts, by the way I am no expert, just a keen observer of ageing women so that I can learn from them.

Pre Facelift, boobs also look lower too...

Madonna .. After Facelift one, circa 2005

 This would have been around the time of Confessions on a Dance floor album, she suddenly appeared on our screens with a new fresher look and dramatic weight loss.
Personally this is where I think she looks best, apart from the hair colour being softer, she just looks fresher, rather than having a "done" look.

Madonna recently.. photo Getty images

Here I think she may have had a second lift, just before her 50th birthday, as that was when we all started to see a huge difference in her face, maybe its just her cheeks but I think she has also had work done to her eyes....
May I please just repeat,  these are all only my own observations and opinions.

So we are back to the beginning...
 Face or Fanny? Our American compatriots would say..
I still think face, but I am going to work on the body, I will keep you informed as to how I get along. I have been in the gym once since September due to chronic injuries, and this was last Sunday.  So far, apart from being unable to even squat on the loo properly, for the past two days, as my muscles were seizing up so badly from shock, I am feeling almost ready to start session two.  My main problem, which affects all results is my addiction for Absolut .. I am trying to restrict its intake to weekends only...Hic


  1. Oh dear, thought you meant something else when you said fanny!! I doubt I'll ever have a skinny arse, so let's just assume I'll have a lovely face ;)

  2. I hope your husband was joking. If he wasn't you can tell him from me how lucky he is to have you, there are very few women who look as good as you at your age and who don't have to worry about their weight and can eat what they like but would just like to firm up a bit. Many women don't eat any more than they ever have but reach an age where the weight just piles on, good job he isn't married to one of them eh? Although they do say fat girls make for a better shag because they never know when they will get the next one!

  3. I am working hard to get to my goal weight(only 10 pounds away from it). Even though I am close to my goal I am FAR from that kinds of body you feature here. I just don't want to work that hard. And I do a lot of masks, facials, and botox to keep the face in good shape. I do feel like a little more gym time might benefit me more than ANOTHER miracle cream. Only miracle cream is easier to do than 60 minutes on the eliptical.

  4. Ruby , I don't think you will need to worry about making a choice. Even if your rear end gets a bit bigger, you will still be gorgeous.

  5. Oh my God, I love this post and your attitude especially "Why not use everything that is available to you, both men and women?" I think the same thing. There's so much attitude towards people who make an effort. If you don't want to make an effort, don't, but don't give me crap about it! I think people drone on about "aging gracefully" when they've given up. Personally, I had to step up my effort at the gym recently. I definitely hit that "over 40 and what you used to do doesn't even maintain you anymore" moment. It was very demoralizing! But I'm happy to be feeling stronger. I'm hoping the chubby cheeks I disliked as a kid will keep me from having to make a choice between the face and the rest for a little while longer.

    As for Madonna, I don't think her body should even be judged like a regular person's...if you've seen her in concert (as I have a dozen times) she's more like an athlete -- maybe a marathoner -- than a civilian and honestly, a lot of professional marathoners don't have bodies I would ever want. But good for them if it's what they want to do.

  6. So loved this post.. I have missed your wonderful and witty writing! This is so true ... I think Madonna looks great and we would all get a little help if we were her. I mean look at all the $$$ people spend on topical creams - to try and get the look of the girl (usually early 20s) with no wrinkles or flawes forgeting they are twice the ad girl's age... can;t wait for your next post!!!xo HHL

  7. What a great post! Can't I have both? Please?

  8. Good to see you back to blogging at last. You're gorgeous anyway!! I'm trying to get a bit fitter (not trying quite hard enough... yet) and I definitely choose my face! I do have Skype I must put it on. Do you have iChat? I can't believe your phone doesn't work! Dying for a catch up xxx

  9. This is an interesting one.I think it's about the amount of work that gets done,I agree Madonna looks better in the earlier photos but I always imagine they have more done so it lasts a bit longer! She does look odd in the last photo.
    I was surprised by the Gordon Ramsay hair transplant as I hadn't even noticed he was thinning..
    I'd definitely go for face,I spent most of my adult life painfully thin until diagnosed with coeliacs,now 3 stone heavier but a lot healthier..

  10. Hey Gorgeous! Face over fanny everytime. Personally I think that tracy Anderson looks a little freaky in the second photo that you posted, her hip bones seem out of perportion.
    And, I'm not even going to get started on Madonna.
    The issue with age is skin elasticity. You can lose weight but you can't make your skin tighter without surgery. Who wants to be skinny with hanging skin? So I've said screw it to trying to lose weight.
    One more thing. It isn't the size of your fanny that matters, it's the proportion of your waist to your hips. The 7 to 10 waist to hips proportion is attractive in women of every age. I'm working on narrowing my waist and forgetting my fanny.

  11. Well, you know the botox debacle that I just recently went thru...and I'm still reeling from the repercussions. Although it has been a little over two months and things are getting better. I think I'll still concentrate on the face and learn from my face.

  12. I am doing the same thing and trying not to drink during the week nights. I HATE it. Laugh.

  13. Is it really true that botox works for migraines too? I'd be ever so grateful if you gave your opinion. Glad to see you blogging again, you write in such an entertaining fashion!

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